Be Here Now

You've heard every version of this wisdom but every now and then you can hear some guidance that really let's you hear it. Here's mine. Yesterday I read this:

"Be in the present. Stress and anxiety happen when you are managing the future."

As if :)

Running Yellow Lights

Last week I heard this great line: “Running yellow lights is not accepting life on life’s terms.” It’s so perfectly true—and it’s funny.

It got me thinking about all the ways that 12-step recovery is trying, trying, trying to teach us how to live life as it is—and on its terms --to limit our own pain—and the pain that we inflict on others.

Think about our sayings and slogans: One Day at a Time, Be Here Now and

“Look down at your feet and stay where they are”.

I think about all the discomfort that I struggle with, and how much it’s because I want to be somewhere other than here so often. Yesterday I had to walk several blocks from my office to another business and I realized that the whole time I was walking that I wanted to be a block ahead of where I was. Even though it was a beautiful day I wanted to be there rather than here. And, of course as soon as I got there, I wanted the next there not the here. It got my attention and I realized it’s a constant state of mind.

But it’s not just when I am walking. When I stop at an intersection I want to be on the other side of it, not on this side. When I read a book I want to know what happens instead of enjoying how the writer is leading me now. When I am listening to a CD I want to be on the next track or the next disc—not this one. No matter the form or place or idea, I want to be there. But when I get there I’m not really there at all; I’m still longing for the next there.

I do this with things too. I can long for a pair of new boots or handbag or coat, but shockingly soon after I get it, I’m thinking about some other thing that I imagine I’ll like. That thing will be the next right thing. I think it’s just another way of trying to get there instead of fully experiencing and being here.

As active addicts we saw all of our grasping and craving and clinging, and now in recovery we have softened our behavior and changed our medium. But still. When I drive through an intersection and think, “Here I go”, or when I want to be over there and not here, or when I want another bag, or coat or shoes I’m not living life on life’s terms. Maybe, just maybe, I could let that next yellow light be my clear signal.

Live in the Present

How many different ways can it be said? Here is a beautiful version by Blaise Pascal:

“We never keep to the present. We recall the past; we anticipate the future as if we found it too slow in coming and were trying to hurry it up, or we recall the past as if to stay its too rapid flight. We are so unwise that we wander about in times that do not belong to us, and do not think of the only one that does; so vain that we dream of times that are not and blindly flee the only one that is. The fact is that the present usually hurts.”


--Blaise Pascal, Pensees (#47)

Defying Physics or Be There Now

My commuting time to work each day is about thirty minutes. Each morning as I’m driving to work I am thinking about the meetings that are coming up or the conversations I need to be prepared for. Some degree of that is good management. But this week in the car I had to say to myself—out loud—“Stop trying to defy the laws of physics—you cannot be at work while you are in the car and not yet at work.” I was having this “get there, get there, get there" mantra in my head—trying to will myself to be at work while I was 20 minutes away.

What a pleasant way to start the day, huh? So much for be here now and living in the present moment. But realizing that my mind—and body—were somehow trying to defy physics got my attention. So now I’m saying, “When you are in the car you are in the car.”

Progress not…well, ya just gotta laugh.