Crying in AA

I cried in a meeting today. It’s been a long time since I have done that. It didn’t feel good when the words were burbling out of me and I was thinking, “All these years and I’m crying because my feelings were hurt.” I was sad and unsettled by my emotions, especially because my damp sharing followed “younger” AA-er’s who spoke of gratitude and goodness and God.

But later I thought of my own gratitude for this place where I can go and that even when I try to look good, it is safe enough for the true me of that moment to come out in grace or in garbled sobs. After the meeting I got hugs and recommendations that included gratitude, goodness and God.