Tuesday, March 02, 2010

Learning and Re-learning

I am reminded that we learn in spiraling circles. We make progress and move forward but we also reach back into territory or lessons we’ve learned before. Maybe these are refresher courses? Or maybe they are new levels of the same lesson.

Today my new-old lesson is this: Tell someone. Tell someone how I feel and what is bothering me.

In early recovery this was a big one and something I had to practice daily. That’s why we learned to call our sponsor or another woman in recovery. To say, “This is what happened today and this is how I feel, or this is how I think I feel”. And sure enough that small step will start the shift of thinking/feeling/healing.

Further into recovery I sometimes forget that and I think that I can figure out my own feelings or that I am supposed to. But no, the sorting and discernment happens when I tell someone.

What does change is who I tell. Today I have many friends in recovery and many friends who are not in recovery but who happen to be more-or-less sane. So I can also talk with them. Or talk to my partner! Now there’s a wild idea: tell my partner what I feel. Which also allows me to be known by him, and me to know him, and it creates-- you guessed it—intimacy.

Ok, relearning underway.

What lesson from early recovery are you relearning this week?

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