Monday, December 01, 2008

The Scary Voice

I’m thinking a lot about my thinking. This idea of two voices and the schema voice that trips me up so often. I’m reading a very helpful book called “Reinventing Your Life” which is about “life traps” or this schema voice or habit of thinking.

It strikes me that the schema habit or --the scary voice--is an old part of me. In fact it’s so old that it’s really a very young part of my self. It’s a kid’s voice. It is incredibly powerful and ingrained—persistent, resistant—but it is young. That voice is trying so hard—scary hard—to find stasis and familiarity. Even though the schema, scary voice is disrupting my life and has caused damage for years and years driving me out of relationships and into all kinds of pain—it does (if it can be personified) want to have safety. It thinks it is helping me. In its own weirdly misguided way it wants to help and protect me.

So the challenge is to change and redirect this schema or voice with out being violent to it. It needs to be changed with compassion; it needs to be lovingly thanked and then retired.

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