“Stay in Your Lane.” I’ve been saying that to myself a lot recently. It’s a great mantra and a reminder, and it comes with an easy visual.
We know, as drivers, that it’s dangerous to weave back and forth lane to lane, and even more dangerous to drift into an oncoming lane. It’s also true—though maybe not quite as life-threatening, that it’s dangerous to drift into someone else’s lane—at work, at home, in friendships and in romantic relationships.
Staying in your own lane is a combination of boundaries and discernment: What is my business? What is not my business? It’s not always clear. But—continuing the metaphor—that’s what the broken line on the highway is for.
A couple things can help us stay in our lane. One is watching for the red flags.
One tool is listening carefully to what you are saying, especially how you preface any comments.
If you hear yourself saying, “It may not be my business, but…” You are correct. Stop right there and get back in your lane. Ditto, for “I’ve never been (a parent, married, seriously ill, faced with infidelity, a boss, laid off…etc.) but I know that I would….(Insert unsubstantiated advice here.)” No, you wouldn’t. And, you have no idea so cruise back to your own lane.
Anytime we say things like, “If my husband ever..” or “If my kid ever…” we’re blowing hot air. We might fantasize about what we’d do, but in reality there are so many ways to live thru hard things that none of us actually knows what we’d do. Turn that wheel.
Another red flag to tell you that you are drifting is to pay attention to your body. Is your heart racing, breathing accelerating, temperature rising, voice raising? You have left your lane and what you say next is 99% most likely to be a mistake or an over-reaction. Gently bring your lips together and take a seat, get a glass of water. Wait a minute or 30.
We almost never regret what we did not say. If it turns out that you have had a related experience (You directly, not your sister-in-law) then maybe share that privately, one-on-one.
A good friend of mine likes to remind me: “Diane, if the other person did not specifically say, “Diane, I want your advice”, then you have not been asked for your advice so don’t offer any. At all.”
Most days, I count myself good if I feel myself drifting out of my lane and pull back just in time.
35 comments:
Well said! There are too many times I have had a knee-jerk reaction to someone else's news, or comments. I like ... "wait a minute or 30". Absolutely great advice.
I so enjoy reading your blog. Thank you.
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Website: https://drmuruguspellhome.com
Thanks to all those out there who in one way or the other has been able to let the world know about this powerful spell caster called DR.Muguru. I was just searching the internet for some stuff then i came across an article about how Dr. Muguru was able to save and restore broken relationship. Before i came across the article i have been facing hard times in my marriage since my husband packed his things out of the house, So i contacted Dr.murugu through these details via email:dr.makinidrmurugu@gmail.com that i copied out of the article.I must say that me contacting Dr. Muguru really worth it because through the help of Dr. Muguru my husband came back home and was pleading for our reunion.If you are interested in reaching dr.makinidrmurugu@gmail.com Call/WhatsApp:+90 538 069 4285
Email:dr.makinidrmurugu@gmail.com OR dr.makinidrmurugu@yahoo.com
Website: https://drmakinidrmurugu.blogspot.com
Website: https://drmuruguspellhome.com
Thanks to all those out there who in one way or the other has been able to let the world know about this powerful spell caster called DR.Muguru. I was just searching the internet for some stuff then i came across an article about how Dr. Muguru was able to save and restore broken relationship. Before i came across the article i have been facing hard times in my marriage since my husband packed his things out of the house, So i contacted Dr.murugu through these details via email:dr.makinidrmurugu@gmail.com that i copied out of the article.I must say that me contacting Dr. Muguru really worth it because through the help of Dr. Muguru my husband came back home and was pleading for our reunion.If you are interested in reaching dr.makinidrmurugu@gmail.com Call/WhatsApp:+90 538 069 4285
Email:dr.makinidrmurugu@gmail.com OR dr.makinidrmurugu@yahoo.com
Website: https://drmakinidrmurugu.blogspot.com
Website: https://drmuruguspellhome.com
Going through a divorce case is very heart broken when you love your partner with the whole of your heart.. My husband left me for a total stranger and I could not imagine what the hell was happening because everything looks like a dream to me. I was lost and confused about my life without any way to get a solution to make my husband see reasons with me that I love him so much. I was very depressed and desperate to win back my husband and I searched on GOOGLE for help about my situation and I got recommended to Lord Zakuza who is a powerful spell caster for he has so many magnificent testimonies and reviews on the internet from different people all over the world. I got in touch with him and I poured out my sorrowful heart to him and he encouraged and promised to help me out. He gave me some instructions of which a adhered to and within 48 hours of contacting Lord Zakuza my attorney called me to get me informed that the divorce case has been cancelled and I got a call from my husband 30 minutes after I finished speaking to my attorney. My husband and I are so much in Love with endless care and happiness and I so much thank Lord Zakuza for doing this for me and I know people out there might also need their partner or lovers back or want to get pregnant for your partner or husband. So, you can Text & WhatsApp Lord Zakuza on +1 (740) 573 9483 or email him via: ( Lordzakuza7@gmail.com ) for a change of story in your love life.
To everyone out there who thinks love spells don't work, I’m here to tell you that Lord Zakuza love spell is the best and most powerful. I am a wealthy man who has lots of assets and possessions but I have difficulty with women. Whenever I try to settle down with any, we end up breaking up and I had no idea of why I was going through such an experience in my relationship. It was so worrying that I couldn’t be myself anymore and I started searching for help everywhere even at my place of work. I was going through my work activities online and I came across a testimony of a lady called ( Febe Anouk ) regarding how Lord Zakuza helped her to restore her relationship with his love spell, I had to give it a try because I needed my Ex lover back that I love so much. I visited Lord Zakuza website online and I told him everything I was going through. Lord Zakuza consoled me and promised to help me out with my situation by preparing a love spell for me. I followed the instructions given by him to me and within 48 hours, my Ex lover came looking for me and pleaded for forgiveness. Since I came in contact with Lord Zakuza, things have changed for good in my life and right now, I am married with two beautiful kids and my home is blessed. All thanks to Lord Zakuza I am forever thankful to you. Visit his website for any help via lordzakuzaspells.com or WhatsApp him on +1 740-573-9483. Try him and your life will be blessed.
I was cured of HERPES with the use of natural herbs. I love herbs so much. Most times, injections and drugs are just a waste of time. I was cured 8months ago, i suffered from Herpes for 2 years but with the help of Priest Babaka herbal medicine, I was cured within a few weeks of drinking the herbs He sent to me through courier delivery service. This same Priest also cured my Aunt from INFERTILITY, as soon as I heard she Been finding it difficult to CONCEIVE, i referred her to the Priest and she was cured after drinking his herbs. I have referred more than 15 persons and they were all cured from their various illness. Have you taken herbs before?. You have spent so much money on drugs, injections, surgeries etc and yet you have no good result to show for it. Priest Babaka is a Herbalist and a Spiritualist , I assure you of a cure if you drink his natural herbs and follow his Guidance. He has herbs that cures HIV, Herpes, Diabetics, Asthma, Hepatitis, etc. Contact Priest Babaka on email: babaka.wolf@gmail.com or Facebook at priest.babaka
My husband divorced me and went after his ex and left me heart broken for 2 years. I have been playing the lottery for some years before I got married and I have never won any big amount. I continued to play the lottery but I couldn't win more than $500 dollars until I was introduced to Dr Amber that is a strong Haiti spell caster. I had a chat with him via +18084815132 telling him what a mess my life has become. He encouraged and promised to get my man back for me and to help me win the lottery. There were specific instructions that was passed to me by him which I adhered to as he prepared the spell for me that brought back my husband within 36 hours and he gave me some sure numbers to play the lottery game. I used the numbers to play the lottery and I won $10,000,000 million dollars and all this happened within a week after I knew Dr Amber. It doesn't matter what you are going through in life Dr Amber is here to help. You can email him too via: amberlottotemple@yahoo.com
Believe it or not Dr Amber has come to stay to do wonders with his spells. I overheard my co-worker telling his cousin how Dr Amber helped him get back his partner within 24 hours . I was amazed about what he said. I searched for this man called Dr Amber online and guess what... He had so many good reviews online about his work. I got in contact with him to win the lottery and he assured me that winning the lottery is not a problem but what do I intend doing with the winnings. I told him what I will do when I become a winner. Dr Amber prepared a spell and prayed for me for 3 days before he told me where to play the Lottery. I did as he instructed me with a positive mindset. To my greatest shock, I was announced the winner of $1,000 dollars everyday for life which is equivalent to a cash prize of $7,000,000 million dollars.. I have no words to thank Dr Amber but to share your good works to everyone that needs help. Visit: amberlottotemple.com or Email: amberlottotemple@yahoo.com
Seeing a wonderful testimony of Mrs Helmah on a reconciliation page about the good works of Dr Ilekhojie. I never believed it, because I have never heard anything about such a miracle before. Nobody would have been able to convince me about it not until Dr Ilekhojie did a marvelous work for me that restored my broken marriage after six months of separation. I was truly shocked when my husband knelt down pleading for forgiveness for me to accept him back. I am really short of words to use to show my appreciation to Dr Ilekhojie for what he has done for me and my Entire family. We are happy together and there is peace in my home. All these are possible because of his reconciliation spell. Contact him now for any kind of help you need via Whatsapp/call/viber: (+2348147400259) or Email: (gethelp05@gmail.com
I just experience the wonders of Dr Ibinoba herbs. God will continue to bless you Dr ibinoba more abundantly for the good work you are doing in peoples life by curing them from different type of diseases. I will keep on testifying about your good work. I was living with diabetes type 1, 6 months ago and my doctor told me that there is no cure. I did not believe him and i keep my faith up hoping that one day i will be cured from this horrible disease. One day i saw a post on diabetes forum about a herbal doctor called Dr Ibinoba on how he cure people from diseases with his root and herbs and i quickly contact Dr Ibinoba on his whatsapp and explain my problem to him and he told me not to worry that he is going to cure me and truly he prepared the herbal medicine and send it to me through UPS and gave me instructions on how to take it. After three weeks of taken the herbal medicine , i went to my doctor for checkup and my diabetes result show Negative and my doctor told me that there is no trace of diabetes in my body and the diabetes is completely gone You can also be cured from any type of diseases by contacting Dr Ibinoba on his WhatsApp him on +2348085240869
After 2 years of being divorced, I still loved my husband and wanted him back. My husband divorced me because he met a younger woman at work. After 17 years of marriage I couldn't give my husband a child and even though it was not my fault, I appreciated him because he was patient with me for many years. I explained all my problems to Dr Ilekhojie and he promised to help me if I am serious minded and willing to trust him. Just within 72 hours my husband my husband drove miles to our house and asked if we could work our way back together and reconcile. He explained to me how miserable he has been these past years and asked to move back home. Dr Ilekhojie also gave me herbs for fertility and now, my marriage is back and I confirmed that i am 18 weeks pregnant already. His whatsapp contact: +2348147400259
The divine man called Dr Ilekhojie everyone has been talking about on the internet has also helped me with his reconciliation ritual. He restored my broken relationship and brought my ex back to me. I was left with a broken after my boyfriend broke up with me but after I saw online about Dr Ilekhojie, I was really pleased to contact him. He told me what i needed to do and he performed the reconciliation ritual and within 48 hours, Andy called and started asking for forgiveness. I want to appreciate Dr Ilekhojie for his great help. Contact him via his Email: (gethelp05@gmail.com) or Phone/Whatsapp +2348147400259
My husband and I have been married for ten years now. Things were moving smoothly for us. Not until this day did my husband come back home and put on a funny face and tell me he wants a divorce that he doesn't want me anymore. I was surprised and shocked because I never did anything wrong to him nor did we fight with each other. He sent me parking from the house without any good reason. I begged him to tell me what wrong I did and he said No. So, I left the house and went to my family house. After some years living without him. I met a friend of mine and told her what has happened to me, she said to me that it won't be a problem for DR WALE to handle. She introduced me to DR WALE so i explained everything to DR WALE he told me not to cry anymore. All DR WALE did was to cast a spell for me, and I followed all instructions DR WALE gave to me. After DR WALE was done with the spell my husband came begging me to come back, he bought me many gifts and he also regretted his actions. You can contact DR WALE Via: WhatsApp/Viber: +2347054019402 OR Email: drwalespellhome@gmail.com
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