Mark Muldoon has coined the term “ambient addiction” to
speak of those things that surround us in our daily lives –that are “normal”
until they become a distraction or a drug—taking us out of ourselves.
We can all name some of them: coffee, ice cream, baked
goods, television, Facebook and other social media. We even talk about
“bingeing” on new TV shows, and going through “withdrawal” if we do not have our
morning coffee right on time. You could make the case that food –especially
coffee and sugar—is a chemical addiction because there is a chemical reaction
in our bodies with these food/drugs.
But what about shopping? Can shopping be an addiction?
I’m asking, of course, because I love clothes and shoes and
accessories. Always have. When I had less money I shopped at Goodwill and
consignment stores, when I have more money I shop at Macy’s, Nordstrom and yes,
online. Online shopping has a deep intersection with Internet addiction because
we both use the same technology and we are baited to shop by online ads,
Facebook posts, and by emails from our favorite retailers with discount
coupons. (Does anyone ever pay full price at Ann Taylor?)
So yes, shopping can take up time, it can interrupt family
life or creative work, it’s a distraction and a wonderful method of
procrastination. Fashion magazines are like drug dealers, “What you need this
summer.” “What every stylish woman has to have.” But is it an addiction?
Some social scientists would say yes. Those who do the brain
research will say that shoppers get a hit of adrenaline and that their brains
light up in the same places for both cocaine and a 75% off sale at Saks. So
biochemically, it’s possible.
But what about culture? How we look, and issues of style and
costume are cultural. Gender approaches to clothing and the quite genuine
language of clothing have been studied and dissected. I love all of that. But
yes, I also love that sale at Saks—and that has little to do with a PhD in
American Studies or Material Culture.
What gives me a clue that my shopping has addictive tendencies
is that way that I think and my language. (Language is the tool of thought and
we know that with other kinds of recovery, “We come for the drinking and stay
for the thinking.”)
Want a mini test to see if your thoughts about shopping are
addictive? Try this. Have you ever said to yourself any of the following?
“I don’t really need anything, but I’ll just go look.”
“Wow, that’s a huge discount, so maybe I should stock up.”
“I can stop shopping, I’m in control, I’m making a choice”
(as your car swings into the mall parking lot again)
“This will be the last one. After this I won’t need anymore
shoes, bags, scarves, earrings.”
“It can’t hurt to look” (and later you are in the car with
bags and receipts—and regrets.)
The regrets and remorse are big clues. If you are driving
home from shopping filled with joy or opening a package from UPS with delight-- that’s one thing. But if
the feeling is dread or regret or shame—then maybe it’s another addiction
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